Niklas' blog

It’s a day with the support tech phone and I’m answering!

I: IT Department, Niklas speaking; how many I help you?
user: Hello! I have a macro that doesn’t work.
I: In which program are you using a macro?
u: Well…I don’t know.

I decided to remote control the user’s computer, i.e. see what the user sees.

u: Why have you constructed a Word document like this? I can’t understand you!

Whoa, Nelly!

I: I’m sorry, but I have–
u: No worries! I just have to have this working right now! Now!

What am I, a shelf-stacker in a tornado?

I: Um, I’ll try my best to help you!
u: You’d better! This is all made by you so you sort out the problem!
I: Of course I’ll help, but neither I or the department where I work aren’t involved in this Word document.
u: What? Of course you are! You’re the IT department!

I almost laughed. We’re the IT department, so we make all things electronic. Willy Wonka makes chocolate, so of course he makes all things chocolatey!

I: No, I’m afraid this document is made by Department X, and we–
u: Well, I’m quite sure you’ve had something to do with them!
I: Not in the making of this document, I assure you.
u: It’s important to me to tell you that it is so! It’s IT!

A new approach was required in order to get somewhere.

I: If you are correct in your assumption – and I am sure that you are – what seems to be the problem with using your document right now?
u: The problem is that I can’t edit some of the fields because of how you’ve constructed it!
I: When you first opened the document, did it say anything about there being macros present?
u: Ma-what?

By now I knew the rest of the conversation inside-out. I knew what would happen, in what order and which problems could possibly arise. I thought. Anyway, macros are described somewhat here and I described this in user-friendly terms to the person I spoke with, and how to enable them.

u: Why did you put macros in there?

I really understand the blame-game here. Some persons need to scapegoat a problem, in order to feel they’re in control of the situation. It’s understandable, but quite tiring, especially when you’re the person watching the phone-queue grow by the minute.

I: I’m sorry, but our department has nothing to do with this file. It has been made by somebody who does not work here.
u: Well…can’t you call them and tell them not to, or something?
I: Not really, because we have nothing to do with each other; they’re a separate entity.
u: Why?
I: …are you asking why we are separate entities, or–
u: No! Of course not!

Silence. Brilliant. Mental tumbleweeds roll right by.

I: Is there anything else I can help you with?
u: Well…yes…the…the…

I felt the user wasn’t going to ask me something relevant. It was rather like watching a frustrated child load a sling-shot and take aim at a nearby animal just to vent.

u: Today computers are one hell of a mess!
I: I agree.
u: Thank you.
I: Is there anything else I can help you with?
u: Only one thing.

The user sounded calm at this point.

I: Pray tell.
u: What are macros for? I mean, really?