In the morning Mia and I spent a glorious few hours together in love and calmness. It was serene and great, I really can’t and won’t tell more about it, ha! We later met up with T&D to get food, which proved near impossible as the place we went to was out of loads of stuff, lo and behold. T’s girlfriend was at another place and got the missing ingredients though, yaah! T&D had even had time to assemble beverages for the evening…lovem. D joined us and we all went to T’s mom’s apartment in Gamla stan where we cooked three different courses and played a lot of Guitar Hero and SingStar. The dishes were varied: a starter made up from sliced baguette, mozzarella, sun-dried tomatoes and fresh basil. Super! The entrée was filled, oven-grilled paprikas, sooo great, filled with rice, cheese and other delicious condiments. The dessert was ricotta-mixed pancakes with strawberries; actually, the ricotta didn’t blend well with the oat-based pancakes we made. It would have been better without the cheese, but with honey it was sweet and tasty, especially considering the drinks we had it with. And the company! Laughter and friendship, love and fun.

In-between all we also celebrate the midnight switch between 2008 and 2009 as you can see below, at Skeppsholmen. Flashy fireworks as Mia and I held each-other close was blissful and I won’t forget it; sounding schmaltzy, I know, but the warmth between our bodies warmed my entire body even though it was freezing outside. None of us opened the bottle of bubbly we’d brought with us, and we briskly made our way back to the apartment after the extravaganza was over.

Mia and I went home after a long while waiting for the freakin’ train which was late forever. The day after we started the slippery slope towards getting ill, which led to full-blown lying down and finishing a book on Einstürzende Neubauten and starting another on the camorra.

The only thing to be in 2009 is…

Xmas in Sweden is traditionally centered around Christmas Eve, which this year - unlike last year - was spent at my parents’ place. It was really nice to meet the whole Swedish enclave of our family on my parents’ side and we had a lot of fun. Dad fell off a chair trying to clean house a couple of days ago, underwent surgery and hence celebrated with one arm in a sling, which didn’t stop him in the least; he was just as manic about christmas as he always it, although mom says he was a tad slower than he usually is. Unstoppable.

Mia and I brought Lotta with us; she charmed the socks off everybody and even managed to turn selfmade tough-guy Magnus (my sister’s boyfriend) into silly putty as he started off by saying something like “Oh, it looks like a rat!” and then trying to get Lotta to hop onto his back so that he could piggy-back her across the apartment and saying he wanted one too. There you go. Next time the US invades a country, I’m going to tip the invaders about setting loose legions of Sphynx cats. That’ll create world peace, I’m sure.

Santa actually came by to bring a few presents for my sister’s kids, who prior to that were disbelieving the existence of Santa. Can you believe it? Lo and behold as both of their parents held them tight to witness a fat, red-and-white-dressed man with a big beard coming by to say hi and deliver gifts! Santa went off to jump-start his deer and go somewhere else while we had dinner; dad had of course prepared vegetarian food for Mia and myself, which is always a big deal to him, and he’s so nice doing it. I think he feels it’s special and has taken special care in preparing the food for us.

After dinner the girls acted Santa’s little helpers (with a little help from my sister), delivered gifts to and fro, and we all smiled at watching them open their own in awe of what they’d received. Yay! Santa did good. Aftermath in the shape of coffee, ice-cream, cookies, questions on whether I’d heard anything from our relatives in Serbia, grandma telling Mia how I’m the spitting image of her former husband, mom telling dad to calm down, sis trying to wring her boyfriend’s neck, Mia laughing at me for some reason or another while I was basting myself like the biggest Christmas turkey you’ll ever see.

Here are some pics from the event:

The day after we went to Flen, which is where Mia’s mom and two baby brothers live. We brought Lotta along for the ride this time too, and she didn’t seem to mind in the least. We sat in the animals-allowed compartment of the train where a cat meowed incessantly throughout the entire trip! Lotta was calm, sitting in her cage all warm, a blanket over her and a pillow that was heated and put under her. She sat like a miniature Buddha and was quite calm. Mia’s mom picked us up and after that gifts were exchanged, unwrapped and we were happy with a DVD player, new music and other stuffs. We all prepared for the evening when the family on Mia’s side turned up with kids who loved Lotta and wanted her to sit on them constantly. Luckily for them, Lotta quickly obliged, and took turns doing that and jumping between everybody’s shoulders. The night didn’t turn very late, and we retired to rebound the second day, where we visited Mia’s grandparents (Ethel and Hasse) who had put together a right ole feast for the entire family. Food, food, food. Mmm! Lovely. We even got a bit to bring home with us.

The time spent in Flen was mostly like massage for the soul; spending more than two consecutive days off together with Mia was really lovely, and I’m really looking forward to the New Year’s holidays! The day after the feast at Ethel’s place, Mia’s mom drove us home and we celebrated the day by eating pizza, away from all foods christmasy. Here are pics from the yuletide spent in Flen:

I mean, using this technology you can scrawl “Dan’s book on flickr, return next friday” on a sticky, place it in the book you just borrowed, hide the book among your countless, million of other books on flickr, then having the RFID-chip that’s implanted in the note communicate with your computer to let your seemingly unintelligible handwriting transform into computer readable text which is then indexed; thus you can now search your computer to find said book, or see the list of all the books tagged “flickr”. Plus the next Friday your calendar software reminds you to return the book. It’s all sick in a big brother sense of the word, yet strangely cool.

Bonus humor pic.

The venue was packed with kids and the only beverages that were served was juice and pop. The four of us sat around and talked when a record label person started making rounds, giving away copies of the aforementioned Danny’s new album. We all grabbed a copy each and laughed at him and his misspelling of the word schizophrenia in one of the tracks on the album.

The warm-ups started going, after a man came onstage, shouting the name of the sponsor and their products a bunch of times. The kids in the venue were quite cute and irritating as they screamed at the slightest thing, like twirling lights going on above their heads. Some dancers came on. Boring. A couple of Swedish rappers came on and made us so excited that we almost paid them attention; seriously, it was all tacky. Danny came on and made us laugh as he was dressed like a bad guy from a 90s b-movie: big, square black glasses, a jet black glittery hoodie and an impeccable dance, consisting of holding one arm next to the side of his body and the other outstretched, going up and down as if he was trying to be as cool as Kevin Federline. Gah!

After that, DJ Viet-Naam played “two more songs before Lady GaGa!” about four times, and then it went down. She came on wearing clothes designed by Christian Siriano and…you have to check her out videos out to get the look, for instance “Just Dance“. She started off to “Beautiful Dirty Rich” wearing glasses with LCD-screens as eyes; she later donned a cane with a glowing cluster of white lights at the top. The choreography was fresh, I’d say especially during “Paparazzi“; the entire act made me think about how much style, clothes, dance and overall visuals play a part for some acts. She cared! Really cool. “Eh, Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say)” was excellent, much as on record, especially as the vibe of the song is extremely summery and when GaGa said she was influenced by her “favourite pop group” which was Ace of Base! It’s quite easy to spot the similarities between the crisp sound of “Eh Eh” as compared with AoB’s seminal pop track “The Sign“. DJ Space Cowboy played her tunes and acted hype man, and the gig was over quite soon. A little showcase, really nice.

Here’s an edited video that I shot, enjoy:

On “popular” demand, here’s the YouTube version, suitable for those with low processor speeds:

People say Bagosora did this or that, that I have the blood of the Tutsis on my hands. But where are all these people who were killed? If they died it is because they are rebels, or because the people were angry with them. But it’s true the Tutsis are trouble. They have taken over a Hutu country. We will fight them again until all the Tutsis are gone.¹

Those are words from Theoneste Bagosora’s mouth; he was yesterday sentenced to life inprisonment by an international court, for his role as “the Heinrich Himmler of Rwanda”², during the ethnic cleansing of Tutsis in Rwanda.

The details surrounding Bagosora’s involvement in the genocide in Rwanda are found in this fresh article, with opinions from Roméo Dallaire.

1. From here.
2. From here.

Another fact than will show you our hardship is the following picture taken just as we finished; a few of us aren’t featured in the picture, mind you:

Albums

In no special order, here are my fave twelve record releases of the year.

Okkervil River - “The Stand Ins”

Will Sheff is a modern-day renaissance man who thinks that people feel like actors in a big drama, making romantic decisions, chasing dreams that are divorced from reality, based on promises fed through TV, films, magazines, books and music - without anyone to stitch them together. This album, the follow-up (or appendix, if you will) to last year’s “The Stage Names”, deals with many a subject attached to being in a band, lyrically as well as how the world around OR has shaped itself of late; members have passed and joined, videos have been made and an entire cover-project - that Mia and I are part of - has been laid before our feet.¹ Will’s voice is better than ever, and I’m patiently waiting for new songs.

SebastiAn - “Motor EP”

When I first heard him, it was through Justice’s Coachella mixtape which was released through the now-defunct muxtape.com. I was floored by SebastiAn’s groovy, mechanical swing; it was as if somebody had recorded a young, hungry punk band and the engineer had pushed all the levers to the max, fucking the sound up. The energy of tracks like “Momy” and “Army“. And if there’s doubt of what he’s capable of, check out the gruelling “Dog“, nicked from the Ed Banger label’s third compilation, “Ed Rec Vol. 3“.

Portishead - “Third”

Having scrapped work that would have made up an entire album in order to work from anew because they were afraid of sounding like “a Portishead cover band”, this emerged; 11 years in the making, “Third” proved what most already knew, i.e. that their two previous albums weren’t results of fluke. The only real hard time I have with this album is whether or not to say it’s their best yet; granted, “Machine Gun” is not my favourite track, but listening to a song like the 70s-wafting, progressive, harrowing, groovy and album-opening “Silence“, I’m theirs.

Booka Shade - “The Sun And The Neon Light”

When I first heard this album, I didn’t think much of it. I let it run in the background while I rode the subway from and to work. The second time, I found myself listening actively to what went on, and wondered why I was reacting this strong to a house album. No offense, I’ve got all the time in the world for good house, it’s just that I haven’t heard anything this good in such a long time. This is well thought-out and composed music that I strongly recommend.

Girl Talk - “Feed The Animals”

If sampling were a crime, Gregg Gillis would be doing time. His record label is named Illegal Art and his albums consist of small strands of own electronic sounds, segueing many samples of songs by loads of other artists. Thing is, Mr. Gillis has a penchant for making groovy stuff. Too much of his music quickly becomes…too much to my ears, but I think this is the best he’s done so far and just enough to make you go bonkers. My man Zak lays down the law accurately, so check out his post for why you should be doing half-assed moves to this shit at 4AM in the moanin’!

CSS - “Donkey”

I’ll say! After having shoved Lovefoxxx’s ass from off Mia’s face I wondered if things could get worse. They did - my own assuming this band wouldn’t do better than their debut album! Right now, with “Donkey”, I’m saying they’re even on top of Bonde Do Role! They’ve - in my eyes, of course - here performed a twist similar to that of Arctic Monkeys’ last year, by releasing a more mature follow-up to their debut album. Filled with hooks, great choruses, stabs and experimental vibe, this is one of the most well-produced and loveable albums of the year.

Lady GaGa - “The Fame”

Even though some criticise Stefani Joanne Germanotta for doing things that others have done before - hellaou, who hellacares if she does? While her songs are brilliant pop tweaks that induce dance and wylding out, imagine this - her whole album is just like that: ass-shaking, funny, funky with enough melodies to make you think the 80s has been reinvented in a great way. GaGa herself reminds me of Swedish artist Leila K in her heyday, but is more illustrious than that, having written songs for Britney Spears, Pussycat Dolls and New Kids on the Block. Come to Stockholm now, damn it!²

Soulwax, Justice - “Part Of The Weekend Never Dies”, “A Cross The Universe”

Although these two albums are made by different bands, I will not review them apart. They’re like two separate beasts intertwined. To make matters worse, I must say that Soulwax is the winner, hands down, although Justice worked hard at emerging triumphant. Both albums are signs of vitality, strokes on a canvas reflecting how electronic music fuses punk with beats that were once born in Africa when humanity was born. A monumental groove which works best with Soulwax, whose album consists of live musicians performing the remixed version of their album “Any Minute Now”, called “Nite Versions”, while throwing DJ’ing into the ordeal. This is no different than what Stockhausen and even Kraftwerk did in their early existence, but then again, can you show me an album like theirs? An album that makes you feel a bit like the first time you heard Daft Punk’s seminal album “Homework”? The force from the live feel of the album is undeniably very strong, and the filmed documentary that accompanies the album is very strong; together, you have a potion that moves mountains; when they remix their own songs live and suddenly add T99’s “Anastasia“, re-evolving into a completely sweat-drenched beast…you lose it.

As far as Justice are concerned, it’s a known fact that they aren’t exactly playing live, but their mixing capabilities are at times so good they’re completely beyond touch, evoking shouts of “Genius!” from the rafters. At times, their so-called live album indeed make you D.A.N.C.E., but it can’t hold a candle to Soulwax’s effort.

TV On The Radio - “Dear Science”

I liked “Return To Cookie Mountain” but I really like “Dear Science”. Although I think the main difference has to do with the way this album is more rock-shaped than the more destitute previous album, there’s something about the sound in this one which separates them. So, what about the rest? The song and lyrics; Tunde Adebimpe’s dark and illustrious voice makes way as a true instrument of its kind - at the same time reminding me of Saul Williams’ great poetic voce - while the synths and loops leave The Killers’ recent album in the dirt. And the guitars! Oh, my. It’s art.

Bon Iver - “For Emma, Forever Ago”

With this re-release courtesy of Jagjaguwar, Bon Iver really turned up in the limelight of things. Mia and I saw the band about two days after she discovered them, and I tried my best to listen in to what the album was about. Immense sadness and grief, torment and anger, all enveloped in gentle words and harmonics that blew my mind when performed live; it’s little wonder that this album (and band) has gone into my heart to remain there for the time being. Here’s a video of their gig that Mia shot. The song is “Re: Stacks“:

What I should have covered last year

Holy Fuck - “LP”

OK, so I’ve covered this lot live at Way Out West, but their album deserves a lot of high-lighting. This is experimental, nonsensical, dada and crazy grooviness that only people like Super Furry Animals, Kraftwerk, Beastie Boys, Atari Teenage Riot, Dinosaur Jr. and James Brown can come up with, when the feeling is right, the time is right and they actually commit their ish to record. The track “Lovely Allen” pole-vaulted these guys into the indie mainstream with its catchy riff but it’s their melodic droning that caught my ear and transformed this into a band to be reckoned with. Check out their Myspace and get both of their albums now.

Robert Plant and Alison Krauss - “Raising Sand”

I should have known that Robert Plant, singer of Led Zeppelin, had it in him to sing the sweetest, most carefully whispered tones of blues in minor that you’d be likely to hear in a long time, but stupidly, I cared about this album way too late, until a colleague of mine tipped me off. Alison Krauss is amazing in her dueting with Plant, and as none other than T-Bone Burnett has produced this - and played wonderful guitar on ten of the tracks - this is the most uncovered album you’re likely to hear in a long time.

Discovered this year

Shinichi Osawa - “The One”

The best house/techno I’ve uncovered in ages, reminiscent to Orbital yet at the same time very special; his covering The Chemical Brothers’ “Star Guitar” and bettering the track says a lot about how great I think he is. The album contains a few tracks that are so-and-so, but as a whole, this is unique.

Hanson - “Middle Of Nowhere”

OK, laugh at me, bitches, but this is a great album! As produced by The Dust Brothers, I thought this might contain a few interesting samples and scratches - which it does - but backing all of this you’ve got a firm base in the shape of great pop tracks, and don’t let your prejudice fool ya!

The 1990s - “Cookies”

The true one Glaswegian band to have caught my attention this year, having released an album filled with panache, cockiness, garage rock and great, bad lyrics. Do check them out.

Wishy-washy

David Holmes - “The Holy Pictures”

Some of the tracks, e.g. “The Ballad of Sarah and Jack” are just harrowing and lovely, while others are just…there. All in all, this is a good album, but compared with his two previous ones, history will hold it against him. You can do better, Dave!

Immortal Technique - “The Middle Passage”

Finally released, but sadly, it was all known territory. Although I must say, the song “Mistakes” is absolutely brilliant and there’s no other rapper quite like him, combining Noam Chomsky and cheap laughs; yeah, he’s the Bill Hicks of hip-hop.

Disappointments

Dirty Pretty Things - “Romance At Short Notice”

What the fuck happened? Carl! You were so close to twisting Pete’s fingers and giving him carpet burns, and the single “Tired of England” was so lovely, but…what? The first album was hungry, vibrant and young, and this one was worked over and over, and I did see the danger signs when Alan McGee stated it was “great” and “arty”; it was arty, but not great. Comparing the two albums DPT left as their legacy is like comparing Ramones’ first album to the one produced by Phil Spector; it’s still Ramones, but not as we know it - and the not-so-great one is rather daft when it comes down to it, right? Still, we all hoped for a genius comeback but alas, will The Albion ever veer back in triumph? I’ve got more hopes for Mr. Barât than for 99% of pop-making society, so here’s a toast to his previous efforts, and strong hopes for 2009!

Glasvegas’ debut album as opposed to their singles

I wasn’t expecting a whole album filled to the brim with Geraldines, but I definitely wasn’t expecting filler like what plopped into our laps. Despite the entire lovely girliness of the 50s Phil Spector-sound mashed with what The Jesus and Mary Chain once brought to Glasvegas’ conscience, I’m just sad that they didn’t diversify their album more, especially considering how much better their sound and allure worked on their singles, definitely including the b-sides. It’s not a case of less is more; it’s “The Pipettes” all over again!

MRK1

I won’t even go into this as I loved his brilliant album “Copyright Laws”, but listening to his recent vinyls would probably be like managing to hit Dubya with shoes: hard work.

Guns n’ Roses - “Chinese Democracy”

I’ve said all I need to say here; even though proffering critique in this instance is a bit like kicking a dead horse, I still have to do it in order to try and save future metalheads from not discovering their beautiful debut album “Appetite For Destruction”.

Reissue, repackage, repackage

Morrissey - “Greatest Hits”

Relying heavily on his newer albums for ammunition, I feel he opted for the release of this compilation because he a) didn’t care for the olden greatest hits, legion as they are in numbers, b) wants to show the world how much he loves his latest tracks and perchance c) wishes to parlay a few tracks from off his coming album, “Years Of Refusal”. I’ve made my own “Morrissey’s Greatest Hits”, thank you.

Beck - “Odelay [deluxe edition]”

Ah yes, another 2 CD version of an epic album. Did it do any good? Well, yes. This is my favourite album by the man, incidentally produced by The Dust Brothers - see Hanson, above - and the bonus tracks are definitely worth this purchase. By the way, here’s bit of a funny press release that was issued after this version hit the streets:

The first pressing of the recent Odelay: Deluxe Edition was found to have gone out with un-proofed lyrics that were taken from a lyrics website as placeholders for layout purposes. Beck apologizes for this unfortunate oversight and is making arrangements for the corrected lyrics to be available gratis via Beck.com. Subsequent pressings of the Odelay: Deluxe Edition will also include the corrected lyrics.

Quite funny considering how the real lyrics were first actually just placeholders to begin with!

New Order - “Low-Life (2 CD Collector’s Edition)”

Unlike the shame that The Cure’s remastered “Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me” was, this is really worth buying. Apart from the fact that I think this is their best album - on a divided first place together with “Technique” - this is where Joy Division and New Order came apart for me, while showing what massive potential they still had. The second CD contains 12″ versions of many tracks, but notably the 17:28 version of “Elegia“, guaranteed to blow minds. This album is 80s pop, electro, harrowing harmonies; doom meets glee and I love it.

R.E.M. - “Murmur [deluxe]”

The first things I knew about this album were that “murmur” is one of the most easily pronouncable words in the English language and that all band members individually, without any other member knowing about it, approached producer Stephen Hague and asked him to lower the volume of their instrument/voice. With that in mind, having also learned that the band refused to record any “rock music clichés” (e.g. guitar-solos and synthesizers), I listened to this deluxe edition and was taken over instantly. Despite having listened a lot to “Automatic For The People” and “Monster”, I find this to be their best album, and the second disc - containing a live concert - is nice.

Looking forward to in 2009

Morrissey - “Years Of Refusal” [to be released 2009-02-16]

Yep, it’s coming, and although some have already reviewed it - haven’t the rest of us, if only a tad? Of the twelve tracks making it to the LP, two³ have already been released. Still, I long for this like the company of a long lost friend. Come hither, please. Please. I know I’ll probably sit in awe and shock when the melodies hit me. I wonder if Alain’s written any of the tracks.

Lightning Bolt - “Funny Farm”

Nobody knows when this album will be released, but judging from how I think their albums become better by each release, this might be one of the very best albums of 2009. Of course, providing it will surface at all.

Andrew Bird - “Noble Beast” [to be released 2008-01-20]

Yes, it’s leaked, and yes, a little bird’s⁴ told me it’s better than last year’s “Armchair Apocrypha”, so get saving! There’s a special⁵ version out there, which means 2 CD!

Iran - “Dissolver” [to be released 2008-02-03]

Kyp Malone, guitarist from TV On The Radio, is member of Iran, who are releasing their first new album in seven years. Good riddance! It’s already leaked onto the Internets, and birds chirp about it being very good.

Otherwise: Anything released from Ed Banger. An album by Daft Punk? Simian Mobile Disco, Shitdisco, Einstürzende Neubauten, Super Furry Animals’ instrumental album.

Best festival

ATP. None other like it. This ruled all. Notes by me found here, here and here. Hey and cheers to Agnes and Mike!

Other lists

Mia’s posted her best of -08, which I seem to copy to no end, while The Guardian have their critics’ poll where they actually posted Bon Iver at #1, a few hours later to bump them down to #2, placing TV On The Radio at #1. I’m not with you on that one! last.fm have posted a Best of 2008-list, based on what people have listened to the most during the past year; artists, albums and tracks are given their respective lists. Not surprisingly, Portishead’s “Third” end up high as it was streamed in its entirety for a week prior to release, exclusively on last.fm. “Ghosts” by Nine Inch Nails is a freely downloadable album. Coldplay #1. Enough said. PopMatters also love several lists. And here’s my list of the best music of 2007.

And finally…cover of the year

Mystery Jets - “Bleeding Love”⁶

Any comments? Tell me what I did wrong, give me some recommendations, do iiiit.

1. Speaking of which, in December a year ago, OR freely gave us “Golden Opportunities”, a collection of covers; it’s still available, through their site.
2. Apparently, she’s coming here on Friday. WTF! Found that out the day after I wrote that! I’m psychic! I’m psychic! Or rather the other way around. I’m superstitious! Eh… I’m a mammal! No, I give up. Language is no longer a friend of mine. Damn, this footnote kinda grew and never quit. Will it, ever?
3. ”That’s How People Grow Up” and “All You Need Is Me“.
4. Pun originally not intended, promise.
5. According to Bird’s site, it’s special edition, deluxe edition and limited edition all in one…someone betta getcha faxtrait, beeyatches!
6. Yep, the original being done by Leona Lewis, as written by that guy from One Republic. This track is only available for a week, and then gone!

I started thinking about Susan Faludi’s seminal book about oppression against women in America, “Backlash“. I also thought about how women are fought from an early age in a variety of ways. Here’s one.

Bratz made Barbie lose 15% of Mattel’s income in 2007. In case you don’t know, Bratz is the brand-name of the extremely popular line of dolls that was launched by MGA in 2001. Bratz quickly caught the interest of young girls everywhere due to commercials hammering while The American Psychological Association noted the dolls “come dressed in sexualised clothing such as miniskirts, fishnet stockings, and feather boas … it is worrisome when dolls designed specifically for four- to eight-year-olds are associated with an objectified adult sexuality.”¹

Besides, something that makes me happy that Bratz are going out of business:

A NSPCC report to a Scottish parliamentary committee on Wednesday criticised the way dolls were dressed and said they were sexualising young girls. MGA responded, saying: “The only people who have sexual images of them are adults, who have their own thoughts about these things.”

I’m not saying that Mattel, Barbie and the rest of the plastic children are completely innocent. Miniskirt, schminiskirt; in Barbieworld, the girls are inferior to men. Full stop. And if you’re saying “come ooon!” just think how you’d react if you were limited to being nothing but “cute”, limited to wearing most clothes mini, if not all of them. For instance²:

In July 1992 Mattel released Teen Talk Barbie, which spoke a number of phrases including “Will we ever have enough clothes?”, “I love shopping!”, and “Wanna have a pizza party?” Each doll was programmed to say four out of 270 possible phrases, so that no two dolls were likely to be the same. One of these 270 phrases was “Math class is tough!” Although only about 1.5% of all the dolls sold said the phrase, it led to criticism from the American Association of University Women.

Limited? Hell no. 270 phrases should be enough for anybody; if anybody’s an amoeba. Of course sexism does not solely exist because of the Barbie-brand, but as it is so popular and ham-fists the message in (using stereotypical girly-girl talk), it’s like criticising the nazi party during the 40s for not bringing more than one side of the story while discussing racism.

To further punctuate that what’s said by talking Barbies, I have to show what The Yes Men did using Barbies and G.I. Joes:

In 1993 a group in the United States calling itself the “Barbie Liberation Organization” modified Barbie dolls by giving them the voice box of a talking G.I. Joe doll, and secretly returned the dolls to the shelves of toy stores. Parents and children were surprised when they purchased Barbie dolls that uttered phrases such as “Eat lead, Cobra!” and “Vengeance is mine.”

270 phrases OK, but not angry ones. Those are reserved to boys only. Like the colour blue - not pink. Pink is gay and Evil. Oh, or girly. Like ying and yang. From Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary, edited by Noah Porter, published by G & C. Merriam Co., 1913³:

(Chinese philosophy) the two fundamental principles, one negative, dark, passive, cold, wet, and feminine (yin) and the other (yang) positive, bright, active, dry, hot and masculine.

Another thing apart from thought, semantics and philosophy regarding male/female in the world of how plastic dolls control little girls and boys, check out the physics⁴:

A standard Barbie doll is 11.5 inches tall, giving a height of 5 feet 9 inches at 1/6 scale. Barbie’s vital statistics have been estimated at 36 inches (chest), 18 inches (waist) and 33 inches (hips). According to research by the University Central Hospital in Helsinki, Finland, she would lack the 17 to 22 percent body fat required for a woman to menstruate. In 1965 Slumber Party Barbie came with a book entitled How to Lose Weight which advised: “Don’t eat.” The doll also came with pink bathroom scales reading 110lb, which would be around 35lbs underweight for a woman 5 feet 9 inches tall.

I can’t stop thinking about how limited the developers at Mattel must feel. Imagine you’re one of them, trying to create something that children will play with, use to fantasize and will most definitely affect their thinking along with a string of social variables that all serve to demean women by casting them into a big, old stereotypical chasm of crap. Their palette can merely contain a few colours - boy blue obviously not being an option - so viva choice, you bastards.

So, how can one change this? Change what’s being sold, change the way people think, change the debasers. It’s pretentious but true: you can only start with yourself, then reach outwards. Treat others like you want to be treated by them, simple, but true. “Be true to yourself and you will never fall.” And, like Stanley Kubrick once said, “I don’t know what I want, but I know what I don’t want.”

1. As culled from here.
2. From this Wikipedia article.
3. As found here.
4. As found here.